Culture

Male Cosmetics: Welcome to the End

Male make-up counters could become a reality within five years, the UK boss of L’Oreal has said, as it is no longer a taboo for the “selfie generation”.

The so-called ‘selfie generation’ is more than lost. It is damned. There is nothing that can save these poor souls, save God Himself. And most of them don’t seem to be interested in redemption so much as looking good, feeling good, and being mostly useless.

According to Mr Sharma taboos are changing and make-up is becoming more accepted for men among what he describes as the “selfie generation”.

He said: “Today you have a very small proportion of men who want to use make up products but that proportion is growing and it will continue to grow. I think its just awareness – two things are happening, men know they can use make up, and they know what it does when you use it.

“The second thing is that the taboos are going, so between my generation and my son’s generation the taboos are very different.”

“Is the trend going to go towards bold colours or more subtle? I don’t know. But what I do know is we are listening very carefully to consumers and what they want.”

Modernity has turned humanity into fools who cannot grasp the basic realities between having a penis and a vagina. To call males who use makeup ‘men’ is an insult to men. These are not men, they are effeminate, useless males with little better to lend to this life than putting on blush and rouge. Again, these are not men. They are a subset of the human species that have a penis but have zero understanding of what it means to be a man.

It comes after online retailer ASOS this week launched a male-only beauty range from MMUK, which includes a concealer, beard and brow filler and mascara.

Co-founder Alex Dalley said: “We hope that this move places make-up for men on the radars of thousands of guys out there who simply want to look their best everyday.”

And at the higher end of the market fashion titan Tom Ford has also launched a small collection of male grooming products including an eyebrow maintenance kit and a concealer set. The brand’s “Brow Gelcomb” is reported to have rocketed in sales, showing it clientele feel the need to keep their “over-eye caterpillars” well-tended.

To cater to the growing demand for men’s cosmetics, make-up artists who usually cater for women’s only customer bases are starting to post tutorials on their websites specifically for men to provide them with tips and tricks.

It’s one thing for a man to trim his beard into Tony Stark sharpness and sculpture. But concealers, beard, and brow fillers, not to mention mascara? A damn insult to anything masculine. But, in this age where just being a man is considered ‘toxic masculinity,’ and weak males, it makes a backwards kind of sense that males would think that grooming their eyebrows and watching video tutorials on getting made up would come to fruition.

Welcome to Modernity, where your man is a bitch and your bitch is a man. Wonderful, no?

It is the first time that men and teenage boys are being offered a dedicated range of concealers and foundations to subtly improve their appearance and boost confidence. The male make-up revolution also offers more accessible solutions for men suffering from spots and skin conditions to cover their blemishes without resorting to using “women’s” products.

Without apology, I must say: congratulations, Feminism. You have accomplished your devious goal. You have turned men into women and women into men. There can be no denial of this victory, thus those of us who still understand what our sac was given to us for must simply ignore all of the nonsense of Modernity and take the risk of being hated for our ‘toxic masculinity.”

I suspect that most men, ergo, those who do not define themselves as ‘feminists,’ or ‘feminist allies,’ and who would never for a moment consider blush, eye shadow, or any other form of makeup, are much more willing to be despised of their natural masculine nature than to adhere to the transgender, gay madness of today’s idiotic, ‘diverse’ world, wherein any fool with a stupid idea is taken seriously.

All hail Toxic Masculinity. Deny L’Oreal their cash. Rub some goddamn dirt on your face, men.

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